Stop Getting In Fights

The last ice age ended roughly 11,700 years ago. Why the fuck does it feel like it’s still going on? You walk out your back door, and your nose hairs freeze. This is no way to live. I never understood why all the old people move from Cooperstown to Florida. I get it now. I’m joining in on your migration. My fingers are getting cold just writing this. My bedroom is in the attic, and there’s no insulation. Pump the heat? Won’t matter. During the summer, pump the AC? Nope. There’s no climate control. My last post wasn’t the happiest of all time. I thought it was meaningful, but I know it was heavy. I wanted today’s post to have a different pace. So, why the fuck do people physically fight? I’ve never understood why anyone brags about almost getting in a fight or having the ability to “beat the shit” out of someone. If you think bragging about having the ability to “beat the shit out of me” is impressive, you need to get in line. A goldfish could beat me up. You aren’t special. I’m mainly talking about college guys here. College guys (who indulge in alcohol a bit too much) love to talk about beating someone up. Why punch someone when you could just emotionally wreck them instead? Bruises heal—minds don’t, really. I don’t get it. Guys like acting macho and saying this shit, but all I hear is a bunch of baloney. If you really could’ve “beaten the shit out of the guy,” then why didn’t you, pussy? Do it, see what happens! If anyone ever punches me, I’m pressing charges. I don’t care if that’s a bitch move—it’s happening. You made the choice to punch, I’ll make sure you get repercussions. Instead, just fuck with them mentally or, better yet, be the bigger person. Realize everyone makes mistakes. The reason I’m writing about this is because there was almost a bar fight when I went out to dinner tonight. The little fragile drunk man wanted to prove himself. All he did was prove himself to be an obnoxious asshole and got kicked out of the bar. Pussy! Although I don’t truly understand the need to physically assault someone, there are a few times when I’ve wanted to throw hands. Sometimes people have punchable faces, say something that really bothers me, or I’ve just wanted to do it for a long time and the opportunity presented itself. But I’ve never done it! I’ve never hit someone. Next time you “almost” get in a fight or try to convince someone that you could “beat the shit” out of whoever, take a step back and relax. I view you as a lesser. It's embarrassing. I’m Max Jones, and that’s my take. Happy Wednesday!