Surprise!

Some people like surprises, and some people hate them. I am right in the dead center of that spectrum. For me, surprises really depend on the situation. If something bad has happened, don’t wait and surprise me. Just tell me what the fuck happened. If it’s Christmas and you got me a really good gift, please surprise me! It is a dreary day in New York City. Cold and rainy. Nothing good about it. Except, God doesn’t dislike us too much because Kendrick Lamar released a surprise album. That is a great surprise. See, if Sexyy Red released a surprise album, that would be a terrible surprise. Kendrick Lamar? Now that is a 10/10 level surprise. I remember the last Kendrick album coming out and it being a long time since he released an album. Now looking back, Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers kinda came out a long time ago. It has been two and a half years. For me, it feels like it was just yesterday, but two and a half years is a good amount of time. That beautiful album is becoming a toddler. When I woke up for work this morning, I saw that Kendrick released a song. It got me excited because a single usually means an album rollout is starting. I was saving the song for after work to leave something to excite me. Then I got on my lunch break and received a glorious text from my friend asking if we were doing a Kendrick Lamar listening party again. I think I’ve mentioned before that when Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers came out, a bunch of my friends and I listened to the whole album together and ranked every song, like I did for Chromakopia. When I got this text, I initially thought it was a dumb text. Host a listening party for one song? A bit dramatic, but okay. I went to Spotify to look at the single. That’s when I realized it wasn’t just one song—it was twelve! Kendrick isn’t my number one favorite artist, but I love him, so this new album is very exciting. Back to talking about surprises though. With Christmas coming soon, I want all my presents to be surprises. I say this every year, and it never works. I always break, but this year I am serious. 2024 is the year of surprises, and it will stay that way. Nothing is more exciting than guessing what your present is and then opening it. Can it be slightly disappointing if you really, really wanted something? Yes, sure. But does it raise the Christmas spirit from within? Hell yes, it does! One year, I cracked so quickly that I made my parents wrap the presents I had already opened again. I acted like I didn’t know what they were. Even though it was a putter, and you could clearly tell it was wrapping paper around a putter, it was still exhilarating. Another thing that ruins Christmas surprises is Bella. Not in a mean way, but she eggs me on like no other. Especially when we were younger, Christmas Eve was Bella’s hunting time. She knew if she could get you to open one gift, you’d open them all. She knew I had no self-control. I’m a different man now than I was back then. We’ll see how it goes. Happy Friday, everyone! See you from the sky Monday!